We never know who we really are...

I'm in a little state of reflection today as I have had moments to just think back on my experiences and life these last couple of weeks. It's been quite the reflection and perspective shift that I have needed in my life.

This last week I have been involved in a team training and retreat and like many of Student Affairs we push ourselves outside of our comfort zones to inundate ourselves in Team Building etc.

Anyway let's just say that a lot was prompted during this week and particularly during the retreat that was helpful and stirred a lot for me that was positive. So I wrote down this statement, the title of this blog- "We never know who we really are," It was a quote that was stated prior to our conversation on communication styles.

For me I think it is really telling- we don't know who we are and it's because each day we live we change a little bit and we are still going through our life, figuring out who we are. There are definitely foundations of our identity that won't change- our heritage, our familial ties etc. But how we react to things does change as we learn lessons and experience life. So I definitely agree with this statement- "We never know who we really are," because we are in flux constantly being shaped and influenced by the life we are living.

It's a good thing though, I wouldn't want to go through this world, without experiencing the life I have lived.

That's all she wrote...

Enjoying the skin I am in

Hey World,
 It's been a while!! Sorry to leave you without a little me in your life, I am hoping not to do that again in the near future.

I have been through a lot, not bad, but these last few months since my last post, I am really seeing my life for what it is. When I stopped trying to control my life, I started LIVING... I hope that makes sense. But we spend so much time controlling our every movements and trying to get out of situations some certain results. But when I started to let go of that, and see myself as God made me. I then began to live my life out of joy and a fullness that I haven't had in a very long time.

 So here I am 28, and with a lot more awareness than I have had in the past, and making more sense regarding the world around me. Things I know about myself, I am never truly satisfied. I also, know that I am not seeking perfectionism, just a little bit of stability, comfort and consistence in my life. It's not going to be easy living, and since I don't really know what that means either, I won't allow myself to be disappointed.

But here's what I am realizing for myself more and more. I have been fairly consistent in who I am- I am blunt, direct, I know what I want out of personal relationships- some exceptions, I am still learning what I want out of the intimate personal relationships.

And with that comes patience and understanding that I am dealing with people. And that relationships are more than just me. I find it funny, as a child you can't wait to grow up and do adult things right. I often hear people saying they wish they could reclaim the good ole days. But my good days are what I am living, I am not looking back and saying I wish I could re-experience that again. I have a vibrant life that I am blessed to live and a faith that reminds me that even in my flaws and shortcomings I am a work in progress and that is okay.

I have been in a constant state of reflection these last few months, probably because I am about to enter my last year in my 20s, and when I look back this last decade of my life has been an awesome one! I found my voice, I moved outside of the shadow of my parents' actions and finally created my own story of what I wanted. So with my birthday almost 12 days away I am going to enjoy these next few weeks of reflection and am looking forward to what 29 will bring!

That's all she wrote folks...

Identity: Can you ever really be satisfied?

Hey Y'all:
 It's been a while since I have posted. We are participating in professional development training for my team and job on campus. This past year has been a little taxing in that the team has kind of been influx, with so many transitions in and out of the team.

So yesterday we had a session that sparked this thought- a question was asked of us in evaluating our thoughts- "Do you have a better understanding of your identity in participating in this session?" So here I was, reading this question and going, when can you EVER really have an understanding of your identity. Here's my take, your identity and sense of self is always in flux. Why?

Think about it today I am a single woman, educated, Haitian-American/Black, female, religious etc.. But let's focus on transitional identities. For me I am happy being single, but this will change. I will be married, a mother, so in that how can I answer if I have a better understanding of my identity?  Can I ever really be, when each year I grow and become a little more comfortable with my identity.

Food for thought....

I don't know if I have an answer or if there is really a right or wrong answer, but it is interesting to think about.

....That's all she wrote...