But GOD

These two words are probably spoken often and I realize that the message I am about to type isn't for you, but really to minister to me, I just want to acknowledge that there are probably many people who have gone before me who have pondered these two words in the way that I am about to.

.... 

 It seems I started writing this in February of 2018. By the open sentence, it was sparked by a sermon by Ps. Steven Furtick. I am sure it was a great one... And I can't recall off the top of my head what the sermon actually was and what the 2018 version of me was intending to share, but the 2021 version of me has lived a few "But God," moments between these years that I am sure this version of me has no problem filling in the blanks and making something out of the half written start that this blog was. 

BUT GOD are probably the two most powerful words I'll be so honored to keep repeating over my life again and again. It's in these two words that I realize the turn of my life. That in a moment when I thought I was down and out--- BUT GOD. 

That in a moment when I didn't know where my answer was going to come from--- BUT GOD.

That in the midst of a global pandemic where loss is overwhelming and I catch a mustard seed of hope --- BUT GOD. 

I have given up the word "but" in my vocabulary and do my best to replace it with "and." (That's an unwritten sermon for another day 😉) . 

Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines "but" as a conjunction - used to introduce a statement that adds something to a previous statement and usually contrasts it in some way.  It's the contrast it in some way fa me!  You see, when I think about the previous states of my life, the only contrast I want is the turn around. Where there was a clear shift, a clear change, a clear transition from what was to what is and that can only happen from the strength and power of a BUT GOD. 

I had every reason to give up on life when I was 12 years old, thinking that life had given up on me. Facing some of the toughest challenges I have ever walked out --- BUT GOD.

When things were uncertain and I was running on empty in finances and didn't know if I was going to be able to finish college --- BUT GOD. 

When I have walked with friends and they are believing for their most radical prayer in that season, and they don't know if the answer they get is the one they are believing for --- BUT GOD.

When we have lived through one of the most stressful times of this generation. Seeing an intense volume of loss of life, while losing out in so many things that made us comfortable. To relying on a peace that surpasses all understanding --- BUT GOD.

I want to be ready and open to the more BUT GOD moments that are to come. I want to be mindful to hold place for the "and." In efforts to stay clear of the contrast and hold more firmly to my hope. AMEN!

I'm holding on to the BUT GOD for the things ahead. I am thanking God for the BUT GOD He's walked me through these last few weeks and months.