#Reverb 10- Prompt 10

What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how
did it play out?
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The wisest decision I made was to FINALLY let go of the people in my life who have in someway inflicted pain into my life. And not so much let them go, but let go of the pain itself. I have had many issues with my mother in respect to the fact that she abducted me, took me away from my family and friends. And more importantly because she blames me for the actions that she has taken. I know that I could always hold on to the pain that my mother caused me, but I know that if I do I will let the resentment and the drama consume and hinder me from reaching the girls that I want to get to.
So this year I let it go. It was the best decision to make because I finally was able to breathe for myself, to be happy and confident with the woman I was becoming. Now I get to make these mistakes that only have to do with me and no one else and while mistakes may not always be good thing, in this case it's the best thing because I get to grow out of these mistakes only for myself.
I am blessed to be alive this long there was a moment when I thought I wasn't going to make it. But I am here and I am so thankful!
I have a lot more offer the world out there and I think that with the journey and the life I have lived so far the messages I have to give the world will go far.

#Reverb10- Prompt 8

What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010?
Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.
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Ha Ha Ha! The Social gathering that rocked my socks off in 2010 had to be my 25th Birthday celebration. HANDS DOWN!
The night started off with me having dinner at a friends house and getting introduced to a blind date. Omg! Anyways because it was my birthday I had to look good. I wore a dress I borrowed from a friend, it was purple, black, blue, pink retro and cute. I curled my hair real tight and I wore these hot pink heels.
For dinner my friend made some delicious food, chicken, fried green tomatoes and rice. We had some drinks, well I had plenty. Root Beer Vodka, it was interesting to say the least.
We headed out to the party in Bethesda where I met some of my other friends. See the night was a celebration of my 25th birthday and another friends 21st birthday. So when we arrived most of my friends were there. We held the party at a restaurant that turns into a club at night. The music was amazing (well from what I remember) lol. they played hip hop among other things, which is my favorite music to listen to anyways, so I danced with friends and had a good night. We had a few drinks (maybe more than a few drinks). It was just a great night.
While I do not remember everything from this evening, what I do know is that my friends had a FABULOUS time! I got so many compliments about the party and my friends have since said that if I was throwing another party, that they HAVE to be there! It was a fabulous event!

#Reverb10-Prompt 7

Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different - you'll find they're what make you beautiful.

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I am not sure what makes me different from other people. I know that my life has been made up of many different experiences, however I don't know if that truly makes me different from others. I can tell you what makes people light up about me though. People light up about me because of the passion that I have. I am very passionate about many things. I am not sure of what my life will be like when I get to the end of wherever I am going, but what I do know is that I want to be able to help people. I want to make a difference in the world around me, one that is going to make people, communities and the world much better. We can only strive to be the best that we can be and I don't believe that I will be the best if I don't make other people better as well.
The road I have set for me is not going to be something of an easy task. It won't pay me much, it won't support me or the goals I have for my family as much as I would like, but you know what it's not about the money it's about the end result. My biggest goal is being able to make the world better for my children to live in. So I do what I can. I don't know what drives me, well that's not true. God drives me, He has had me on this path and guided me through so much that it is only Him that knows what lies ahead. I pray everyday for the strength to keep going.
I think the other thing that makes me different is the amount of adversity I have overcome and the level of grace and class that I have managed to get through it all. People don't often know how "hard" the road has been, but the thing that I have learned the most is adaptation. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. So I guess this is me being stronger.

#Reverb 10 -Prompt 7

Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

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My community in 2010 has come out of the jobs that I have. I am a Resident Assistant at American University and my staff this year has come together so well. We enjoy hanging out with each other and we really look out for each other. I think the strength is that although we work together we all have different lives and different passions that don't make us have to sort of be on top of each other all the time. I think the plus is that we also genuinely like each other.
We hold "family" dinners every other week, where I mainly cook (because I love it so much) and we all just hang out and relax. I get excited to get away from my hectic week and see my co-staff and just laugh and have a good time. And when we put on events, WE GO HARD!!!

My other community that I discovered is the one that was created without me and one that I have now fallen into. I work with the Frederick Douglass Distinguished Scholars Program at AU. These students are a great bunch of young adults, and my boss is great. Ironically, one of my RA staff members works with me for FDDS. Which is fabulous! So there is a bit of familiarity and something very new as well.
The community I would like to connect with more deeply in 2011 is my Graduate Program Community. I haven't really felt very connected to the members in my program so it would be nice to build a cohort and grow in learning with them. So that is what I am looking forward to next semester. I am looking forward to growing in this community and growing in my learning through this community. So here is to that growth and here is to yet another year to finding my place.

#Reverb10-Prompt 6

What was the last thing you made? What materials did you
use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time
for it?
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The last thing I made was dinner. Thanksgiving dinner to be exact. Materials, well I used cooking materials pots, pans and this beautiful new knife set that I was given by a coworker. This was my second Thanksgiving dinner that I cooked practically all by myself and it was great. I made homemade mashed potatoes, a big Turkey with a honey glaze. OOO! and the best, I made a spinach and artichoke dip as an appetizer, I think the crockpot is my new best friend especially after being able to do that.

Interestingly enough there is something I do want to make and need to clear some time for it. I have been working on a scrapbook for my sister for nearly 2 years. But I hardly have the time to be able to do it. Which is unfortunate because I think it would be a gift that she would like to have. Part of it is that I need to clear time and the other part is that I need to let go of the emotion causing me fear. The scrapbook is in remembrance of my niece who passed away 2 years ago. While its been 2 years there are things that my sister wants to hold close to her and I don't know if I am ready to bring that emotion up for her.

Maybe it will be something that I challenge myself to do in this upcoming year.

#Rever10- Prompt 5

What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?
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This one is easy. I let go of a few things this year. Some of them were people and others were my own fears and things I let control me that I didn't know I was letting have so much power over me.
Let's start with the people. I let go of a person who was in my life that in my opinion was toxic. Whether she admitted it or not she was a little racist and it just didn't sit well with me to have that type of person in my life. There were comments that she would make about Black people, things that I didn't even think a sane person would say. Anyways, after a few comments that she made to other people about Black people and just her lifestyle and the fact that her Facebook status was always cluttered with drama, I felt it only right to let go of her in my life.
Then there were things that I let go in my life. I have had many interesting circumstances happen to me in my life. When I was 12 my parents got a divorce. By the time I turned 13 my mother had abducted me and moved me to California. I have for the most part lived my life in reaction to those circumstances and this year I chose to let go of this way that I lived my life and start living my life for myself. So with the help of weekly counseling sessions, many tears and a few blogs I have begun the process of letting it all go. So I am letting go of the person who lived her life in the shadow of the other things that have happened.

#Reverb10- Prompt 4

How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?
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I don't believe I cultivated a sense of wonder in my life this year, as I believe this sense of wonder has always been instilled within my life. But I know that my sense of wonder grew ten-fold and how I continued to be curious and to be amazed by the world around me was by keeping up with headlines and writing blogs about these moments in our history.
My blog titled "Be the Change" is a blog where I write about the things that happen in the world around me that get me to think why did that happen? Why do we as a culture as a community make the choices that we make. Sometimes it helps me to make sense of it all, to figure out what are the problems we face and what the solutions can be. I hope that I don't ever lose this sense of wonder and I hope that I have an outlet to make sure that I provoke the wonder of another person.